Mayous Parenting Blog

Category: Muslim Mindset Building

  • The Isolationist Theory and Why Walls Never Work

     The Isolationist Theory and Why Walls Never Work

    It was the year 221 BCE, The Chinese Empire decided that in order to protect itself from invaders, it would build the Great Wall of China. The Wall was vast, requiring constant repairs and a massive military presence. Guards and officials were sometimes bribed, allowing invaders to pass. The Wall was effective against small raiding parties, but Mongol leader Genghis Khan (13th century) and the Manchu invasion (17th century) showed that large, well-organized armies could simply go around, breach, or overpower the Wall.

    Why Walls and Isolation Always Fail

    Ultimately, if we want to know the future, knowing the past is always a good starting point. And history has taught us that walls—and isolation—always fail. Over time, the empire grows decadent and out of touch with neighboring nations, which always leads to its collapse.

    What Does That Have to Do With Kids and Parenting Anyways?

    I see a lot of Muslim parents building a wall around their kids—through a Muslim-only community, through limitations on what they’re exposed to. Now, that doesn’t mean we should sign up for Disney and let that run all day in the house, playing princess movies to our young daughters. But the middle is always the hardest to reach, and it is always where the greatest rewards are—if we are able to navigate as parents.

    Expose to Reality, and Teach Alongside Them

    The reason why walls fail is because they are the equivalent of a shield. Instead of helping the individual become strong enough to overpower an opponent, you are indirectly telling them they are too weak to face reality and should hold a shield all day long. Obviously, in any real fight, shields—or deflecting techniques—are part of the strategy, but they are never the only component a fighter has at their disposal.

    Use Shields, but Help Them Build Strength and Techniques

    If you teach them to recognize some of the faulty values in society, TV, or books, you are helping them learn to fight back. Learn to recognize the pattern, understand its values, and decide whether they want to internalize that or not. They are not passive anymore. They are active, aware, and deciding what they want to internalize.

    The Longer Path

    Yes, it means you have to spend time with your kid and not let them be brainwashed by TV. You can limit them to Muslim TV only, but they may be out of touch with friends who talk about other Western shows they don’t know about (isolation theory again). And one way or another, they will be exposed to content that isn’t Islamic.

    And it is not just age that matters. We think of time as time. But in reality, it is the events in the seconds that make up time—not just time passing through itself. If you don’t help your kids build a thought mechanism, a mindset that allows them to interpret the data around them, then you are not helping them be strong. You are letting them stay weak and shielding them from the harsh realities of the world.

    Walls always fail eventually.

  • The Hidden Truth About Pigs: Teaching Kids the Wisdom Behind Halal Food

     The Hidden Truth About Pigs: Teaching Kids the Wisdom Behind Halal Food

    If you tell your child, “Pork is haram; we don’t eat it,” without explanation, you’re giving them a rule, not the understanding behind it. You, as an adult, reached that conclusion after seeing and learning about different things. But children are a blank slate, and they don’t see the difference. They’re not trying to be defiant toward you (although if you have teens, that might be part of the mix). They simply may not have the vision you have developed over many years.

    Building the Mechanism, Instead of Giving Them the Final Product

    The knowledge we acquire and the beliefs we hold shape how we see, understand, and interact with the world around us every day. So, we have to focus on instilling two key things in our children. The first is the belief in Allah above all, and the importance of following His commands for our own good. The second is the knowledge—or fuaad—that you help your children acquire with time.

    Is Meat Just Meat Like Any Other Meat?

    Under the carefully marketed plastic wraps of smoked bacon, you might almost think this animal is fit for consumption—it even looks delicious, especially since it resembles other meats children are familiar with, like beef or turkey. And with so many restaurants sprinkling bacon on every dish possible, you might wonder: How could something so omnipresent be that bad? After all, it looks red, like the halal stew Mom makes at home. Are parents just exaggerating? Why are they so wound up about pork? Why does Islam make such a big deal out of it?

    Returning to the Wild to Understand the Place of Pigs in the Ecosystem

    When we return to our roots, to nature, we realize that every single animal has a place in the ecosystem. Even the vicious predator that hunts and preys on the poor, innocent deer plays an essential role. Without it, herbivores would grow exponentially, devouring every last herb until the whole system collapses. So where do pigs fit into all that? We know it, but we often forget to voice and explain it clearly to our kids: Pigs are the recyclers of nature. Unlike herbivores that digest plants or predators that control populations, pigs consume waste materials, playing a crucial role in breaking down and recycling organic matter. They eat anything and everything, helping even the worst waste in nature decompose and become manure, which then helps plants grow. So, naturally, we wouldn’t want to eat the last stop in the cycle of animals.

    Two Ways to Show Kids the Disgusting Place of Pigs in Nature

    1. Take them to a farm. They’ll immediately notice how awful pigs smell, especially compared to herbivores like cows and sheep. Their poop just doesn’t smell the same, given their diet.

    2. Show them what wild boars eat in nature. You can use a documentary or a book for this. As a note, this is precisely what our book, Halal Animals and Mountain Trails, does.

    As always, you can find our books on Amazon for the price of a meal, and if you join our newsletter, you can stay apprised of free eBook promotions!

  • From Tarbiyah to Tablets: Are We Raising Kids or Entertaining Them?

    From Tarbiyah to Tablets: Are We Raising Kids or Entertaining Them? 

    The Proverbial Golden Ticket Out of the Screen Time Hole

    Islam teaches us to choose the harder path today so that we may find Jannah in the Hereafter. This principle applies to our daily lives in ways we often overlook. Every day, we make small choices—whether to take the easy road that brings short-term relief or to embrace discomfort for the sake of a better future. Parenting is filled with these decisions, and one of the most pressing ones today is how we handle our children’s screen time.

    The Easy Way Out: Screens as a Solution to Chaos

    Young children are full of energy, designed by nature to run, explore, and interact with the world around them. Yet, modern life confines them within homes and apartments, where their natural tendencies clash with our adult needs for order.

    “Don’t touch that, you’ll break it.”
    “Don’t make a mess; I don’t want to clean up again.”

    We say no to so many things that, eventually, the easiest solution becomes screens. TV, tablets, and smartphones offer an escape—not just for kids, but for parents, too. These glowing rectangles keep children entertained, quiet, and still. For many parents, they seem like a golden ticket out of the chaos of early childhood.

    But fast forward a few years, and the consequences of those easy choices begin to surface. The children who spent hours consuming screens now struggle with focus, creativity, and real-life engagement. The habit of seeking easy entertainment instead of real-world stimulation sets in. What seemed like a solution for today has created a bigger challenge for tomorrow.

    Choosing the Harder Path: A Different Kind of Struggle

    If you find yourself in this situation, it’s never too late to change course. But to help your children, you must first change yourself. As a parent, you might also be accustomed to avoiding hardship—perhaps by seeking comfort in distractions, entertainment, or routines that make life temporarily easier. Your children, in their own way, do the same. They turn to screens to avoid boredom, just as you might turn to your own coping mechanisms.

    So what can you do?

    You can choose a different type of challenge—one that you can manage better. Instead of battling with screen addiction, embrace alternative activities:

    • Go outside. There’s no mess to clean up at home if you’re at the park.

    • Join structured activities. Whether it’s an indoor playground, a sports class, or a hobby group, these environments provide engagement without screens.

    • Create an engaging home environment. Maybe you want to stay home and interact with your kids, but they won’t sit still for books and games. Instead of traditional books, consider ones that are visually rich and immersive—ones that pull kids into the story and stimulate their senses as they explore the details of each image while you read to them.

    This is where Mayous comes in. Our mission—”One verse, one story, one lesson”—is to provide high-quality illustrations and engaging stories that educate and entertain at the same time. Our books use stunning Pixar-style 3D illustrations that captivate children, helping them truly immerse themselves in the story while learning valuable lessons. Instead of passive screen time, our books encourage active engagement, curiosity, and bonding between parent and child.

    A high-quality, engaging book costs about as much as a fast-food meal—around $10 for most paperbacks—but it might be a step toward helping your child reconnect with real-life experiences.

    May Allah put barakah in your journey as a parent, and may He guide us all in making choices that benefit us in this life and the next. Ameen.

  • Salah, Chaos, and Tawakkul: A Muslim Parent’s Everyday Struggles

     Salah, Chaos, and Tawakkul: A Muslim Parent’s Everyday Struggles

    Teaching Tawakkul to Our Children: Trusting in Allah’s Wisdom

    As Muslim parents, we often find ourselves explaining the concept of tawakkul—putting our trust in Allah—to our children. But let’s be honest: this is a lesson we, as adults, struggle with ourselves. Tawakkul is a virtue that we don’t typically think about when life is going well. It’s when life throws us unexpected turns, disappointments, or even tragedies that we truly grapple with its meaning.

    Processing Life’s Ups and Downs

    When something unfortunate happens—whether it’s a missed opportunity, a sudden hardship, or even something trivial like trying to pray in peace—we go through a series of emotions.

    Like when you finally manage to carve out a few moments of solitude for salah. The house is quiet (miraculously), you set your intention, raise your hands, and just as you begin reciting Al-Fatiha, chaos erupts. A child suddenly needs something urgent, the doorbell rings, or a sibling war breaks out in the next room. You try to focus, telling yourself to stay calm, but with every shout or interruption, frustration builds. You start thinking, Maybe I should have prayed earlier! I should have locked the door! Should I stop and start over? And finally, as you complete your prayer amidst the distractions, you sigh in resignation. Ya Allah, You know I tried. I hope this counts. And deep down, you remind yourself: Allah understands our struggles, and He will accept our efforts, even if they weren’t perfect. Well, in all seriousness now… life does throw some actual and very real curve balls at us…

    And this is where tawakkul comes in.

    Tawakkul is not just passive acceptance; it is an active process. It has three essential steps:

    1. Acceptance – Recognizing and acknowledging what has happened, no matter how difficult it seems.

    2. Taking Action (Asbab) – Doing what we can to improve the situation while understanding that our efforts are part of a larger divine plan.

    3. Finding Serenity – Trusting that Allah knows best and that even what appears as a hardship may have hidden blessings.

    This mindset, however, doesn’t form overnight. It develops with experience, hardship, and deepening faith. Often, our resistance to what happens stems from our ego—thinking we know better than Allah what is good for us. But in reality, we see only a small fraction of the grand picture. So, how do we help our children understand this wisdom early on?

    Teaching Tawakkul to Our Children

    Children learn best through stories, experiences, and discussions. As parents, we can use real-life examples from our friends and family, or even historical stories, to show them how trust in Allah always leads to something better—even if we don’t see it right away.

    One powerful way to teach this is through storytelling. 

    That’s why we created the book Adam Learns About Tawakkul: When the Horse Left… and Came Back! It tells the story of Adam, a young boy who loses his horse—an event that seems like a loss at first. But then, the horse returns with seven stallions, turning a misfortune into a blessing. However, when Adam tries to tame one of the stallions, he falls and breaks his leg—again, seemingly a bad event. But when war breaks out and all young men are called to battle, Adam is spared because of his injury.

    Through this tale, children learn that what seems good or bad in the moment is not always what it appears. The story teaches them the three stages of tawakkul: accepting what happens, taking action, and trusting that Allah knows best.

    As always, you can subscribe to our newsletter to get the eBook for Free during monthly promotion events, or you can find the print version on Amazon.

    Enriching the Time We Have with Our Children

    Every day, our children are exposed to ideas that shape their worldview, whether we realize it or not. With the limited time we have with them—perhaps just half an hour before bedtime—it’s crucial that we make those moments meaningful. Teaching tawakkul through engaging, relatable stories can help them develop resilience, patience, and a deep trust in Allah’s wisdom.

    In a world where instant gratification is the norm, instilling this mindset in our children will equip them with the ability to navigate life’s challenges with faith and confidence. Because, at the end of the day, only Allah knows what is truly best for us.